Envy

I know why envy is one of the Seven Deadly Sins. I found out first-hand what envy can do to relationships. I lost my closest friend over a dozen years ago, due to envy. I know that I need to always control and keep a check on this terrible character defect. Otherwise it can not only damage my relationships but land me into terrible financial trouble.

Many of you know envy under the other, more modern name of “keeping up with the Joneses”. This is just another name for envy. I have never really aspired to keep up with the Joneses. I don’t care what type of car I drive. (For years, we drove a 15 year old Corolla that looked terrible. My daughter would still be driving it if she didn’t crash it.) We lived in a rented townhouse for 3 years. My furniture is about 14 years old (and it is starting to look it! Thanks, doggy). I didn’t want to keep up with anyone because I didn’t have those values.

A few days ago I heard that someone I am related to is going to Europe for Spring break week. Not just one of them but this couple is taking their 3 children with them for the week. That is MY dream! I WANT to go to Europe! I have wanted this for years. About 8 years ago, I almost took off for a week, on my own, and financed my trip with a credit card. (Good sense intervened before that happened!) I have my first trip all figured out. I know where I am going, what I am seeing, etc. Why can’t I go? Why can everyone else go? I ENVY my relatives.

Last week, when my husband told me about our relatives going to Europe, it sparked my envy but it also got me thinking about our financial goals. When we sat down and discussed our goals this past weekend, I found out my husband has very few financial goals (really none). We discussed his personal goals and we discussed mine. His personal goals didn’t involve money. Mine did (ut-oh!). I am not materialistic but I have my dreams. They involve getting my house looking nice, going to Europe, and a few other things.

But the fact remains that I can’t achieve those dreams yet because I must clear up our debt. When I get that cleared up, when we have a large emergency fund, I will be able to make my dreams come true. Until then, I will use these goals as the carrot on the end of the financial stick to motivate me to become debt free. I don’t like envy but I am willing to use it and turn it into the motivation that keeps me on track to clean up our financial house. Then I won’t have to envy anyone because I will be able to make my dreams come true!

What role does envy play in your life? Is it a motivator or is it what got you into trouble?